Are you frequently hiding an ongoing porn habit – and wondering to yourself, Is porn bad enough to really worry about? You’re not alone!
In 2024 survey data collected by Barna, not only do 61% of adults in the US report viewing porn, but half of them say no one knows.
To add to the conflict, 62% of Christians surveyed by Barna said that “a person can regularly view pornography and live a sexually healthy life”.
But – is that true? Can you pleasure yourself regularly with porn and not feel the effects in your sex life and relationships?
Here’s a fact to consider. History is full of popular trends and practices – like lead based paints or cigarette smoke – that really harmed lots of people.
That’s why we’re here to provide research-based facts about porn use to think about. We’ll challenge myths about porn and offer you practical ways to take solid steps toward a porn-free lifestyle.
Table of Contents
- Is Porn Bad? What Is Its Impact?
- Mental Health Impacts of Porn
- How Porn Affects Relationships and Connection: 7 Ways Porn Is Bad for Your Love Life
- Physical and Cognitive Effects of Porn
- Why Porn Is Bad for Society
- 3 Common Myths About Porn Debunked
- Simple Steps to Start Living A Porn-free Life
- Conclusion: Live a Better Life Porn-free
Is Porn Bad? What Is Its Impact?
First, to be clear, sex itself isn’t bad. It’s a good gift to be enjoyed!
But is porn bad? Some say porn use is acceptable, because it’s not real sex with another person.
Others are deeply ashamed of their porn use and wish they could quit, because they understand what Jesus states. Looking lustfully at another person, not your spouse, is a sin.
However, besides looking at porn from a religious perspective, are there other ways porn is bad for you?
Yes. Indeed, research is slowly beginning to show the harms of porn use in the following ways:
- Mental Health: Porn use is often a numbing behavior for trauma, grief, or other emotional harms that need healing. Sadly, porn use just fuels more isolation and disconnection from healing relationships, as we’ll dive into in detail.
- Relationships: “Porn is where the lover goes to die,” says therapist and author Sam Jolman. We’ll tell you why. Keep reading!
- Physical and Cognitive Effects: There’s been a rise in early onset erectile dysfunction that some urologists are directly linking to habitual porn use since early teen years. Other researchers note changes in brain function as a result of pornography use.
- Values and Well-Being: Living in a perpetual cycle of isolation, shame, and guilt due to porn use hinders people from a happy life pursuing their hopes and dreams.
We see ample proof that porn is bad for all people in multiple ways. We’ll discuss the areas listed above in more detail in this article.
Mental Health Impacts of Porn
Does porn cause anxiety? Or is the opposite true – you watch porn because you’re anxious? Well, actually there’s evidence that both are true.
Porn use can make you anxious in the bedroom about your sexual performance. Or it can create anxiety in your partner. Women often worry in online forums that they’re not “good enough” for their spouse after discovering the porn actors their husband views don’t match their body type.
Also, body dysmorphia is a growing sneaky mental health harm of porn. Comparing yourself to the bodies of AI-enhanced porn actors is a lose-lose situation.
Possibly the greatest mental health harm is the isolation of porn use – most often a solo activity. Young people may miss out on developing healthy basic relationship skills and social cues.
How Porn Affects Relationships and Connection: 7 Ways Porn Is Bad for Your Love Life
Does porn kindle true love?
Quite the opposite! Many times a spouse or significant other considers porn use cheating.
But you still may wonder – is porn bad for your sex life? A few top reasons we say YES include:
- Porn is a terrible sex ed teacher. Even though porn is “just acting”, many young adults say they have searched porn to learn about sex.
- Porn warps healthy expectations in relationships. Unfortunately, rampant sexual violence is common in porn as the porn industry pushes limits to sell their product.
- As a result of unhealthy expectations, porn destroys consent in relationships.
- Porn creates betrayal trauma in relationships. “I thought I was somehow to blame,” Melissa said, “This cycle of trying to be enough lasted for years.”
- Porn also damages real intimacy and connection. Therapist and author, Sam Jolman says, “porn curses you to be on the outside of love looking in.”
- Porn reduces sexual satisfaction. What happens to your sexual satisfaction when it’s wired to arousal by porn on screen instead of a real person? New research says, “findings provide support for the prediction that porn arousal is associated with reductions (not increases) in sexual satisfaction and relationship quality and stability across a 2-month period.”
- Porn may cause erectile dysfunction. Some studies also link the rise of early onset erectile dysfunction in young men with compulsive porn use.
Physical and Cognitive Effects of Porn
Porn use fires up the neurons in the prefrontal cortex, the portion of the brain responsible for emotional regulation and decision-making. In turn this can lead to ‘hypofrontality’, potentially rewiring the brain to be more juvenile.
“The properties of video porn make it a particularly powerful trigger for plasticity, the brain’s ability to change and adapt as a result of experience.” – Neuroscience News.com
Additionally, compulsive porn use can impact memory. People who regularly use porn often report feelings of “brain fog”.
Just like you should self-monitor for screen addiction, here’s a small self-checklist of some potential mental and physical changes due to porn use:
- More than normal difficulty focusing on a task or a conversation
- Chronic emotional detachment (ask your spouse or partner what they think)
- Increased depression after watching porn
- Lack of motivation to reach for goals “porn…doesn’t build me up at all and it stagnates me” (anonymous survey response)
- Inability to be aroused by your spouse without porn (erectile dysfunction)
Why Porn Is Bad for Society
We believe porn is bad for people who consume it. But what about those who produce porn?
Many former porn industry actors are speaking out about their true experiences in their former line of work. Many felt trapped in the lifestyle. Some report suicidal depression due to their work.
Alarmingly, the porn industry has well-documented ties to human sex trafficking and illegal sales of rape videos, as activist Laila Mickelwait exposes in her recent book Takedown.
You can never be certain that a porn video you view on any major porn site is actually consensual, as Jewell Baraka shares in her story, Coming of Age on A Porn Set.
Many are highly motivated to quit porn upon realizing a porn habit is funding sexual exploitation.
Not only do children regularly find and get hooked on porn, the most vulnerable are still being exploited by this mega business.
3 Common Myths About Porn Debunked
Myth #1: Everyone watches porn, so it must be harmless.
It’s true – porn is so widespread that it has invaded every corner of the globe.
However, not everyone watches porn. Very vocal, non-religious anti-porn movements are growing, like Fight the New Drug and Culture Reframed.
Large online grassroots Reddit and NoFap communities are also pushing back against porn use as “normal” or harmless.
In addition, a growing number of mental health therapists encourage people to quit porn use due to harms on mental health and relationships.
Myth #2: It’s easy to quit porn.
Unlike previous generations, GenZ and Millennials have had porn secretly and easily available to them since their childhood. Porn literally rewires your brain to seek pleasure on a screen instead of connecting with people.
So, unfortunately, like any habit you wish to break, the longer you’ve watched porn, the harder it is to get rid of.
However, focus on the good news!
You CAN quit porn, no matter how long you’ve been hooked. Hundreds of thousands of people have.
To succeed, you need a reasonable plan, the right online protection, and a good support network.
Instead of focusing on how hard it may be to quit porn, choose to focus on the amazing benefits of living a porn-free life.
Myth #3 You’ll quit porn when you get married.
Unfortunately, many young men think that marriage will solve an unwanted porn habit. Data does not support this!
A 2023 survey of 462 U.S. senior Protestant pastors by Barna, says those pastors regularly help people with porn use and they note: “half of those who’ve sought help from them (51%) are married men.” ~ Beyond the Porn Phenomenon, Barna.com
Simple Steps to Start Living A Porn-free Life
Schedule regular self-reflection.
Behind every porn habit lies a reason.
- Were you bored?
- Stressed?
- Angry?
- Depressed?
Taking time to self-reflect and learn your personal habits and inner reasons you tend to turn to porn is key to success. One of the best ways is to write down your habits in a journal. Ask yourself key questions that begin with who, what, why, and where?
Over time you should see patterns in your journal that give you clues as to why you chose porn in a weak moment. (Or download our free habit tracker…)
Set boundaries.
In the real world we send a call to voice mail and text messages to keep our focus on the task at hand. That is a boundary. Of course, porn can sneak in almost anywhere on your online devices, so it’s vital to set online boundaries and share these with someone else.
You can effectively protect yourself or your children with online porn blockers or an online accountability software that motivates you to stay away from porn.
Find reliable support.
Using accountability software on all of your online devices is the most effective way to train your brain to stay away from porn.
When you ask another person to help you meet your porn-free life goal, you’ve taken a powerful, courageous step to break porn’s secrecy and hold on your life.
Inside Ever Accountable’s app for Android, you can choose to share all your social media app activity.
In iOS, due to their privacy policies, it’s much better to block social media apps altogether to avoid temptation. Let your accountability partner know if you choose to keep social media.
Inside the app, you have many options for additional safety boundaries, and it’s super easy to invite a trusted friend or mentor to be an accountability partner.
Shift your focus.
Be sure to make a list of healthy alternatives to replace the dopamine rush that porn has been giving you. It’s important to fight the void you will feel.
Since porn disrupts real connections and intimacy, consider choosing some activities that involve spending time with your spouse or other people.
Nothing is better than rewiring your brain to see people as valuable and beautiful, not just objects for pleasure.
Track your progress.
One powerful motivation to keep going is having a clean accountability report each week. When you do, you should celebrate this with your accountability partner, and even make notes in your journal.
Over time, in spite of any challenges or setbacks, you’ll begin to see real progress as you track your wins.
Even failures are stepping stones to success as you learn from your mistakes and choose to remain accountable.
Conclusion: Live a Better Life Porn-free
Are you ready to rebuild relationships, regaining your freedom and mental clarity? You can test-drive our accountability software completely free for 14 days.
Go gung-ho, and invite two or three trusted friends to join you on a quest to become all you were meant to be – porn-free and happy!
14-Day Free Trial
Protection From Pornography
Change your habits, change your life: Start our 14-day free trial to help get rid of pornography for good.
